We were asked to share something in yoga in our journals that was a very rough, emotionally breaking time in our lives and how forgiveness and compassion took a part of it and I thought I would share with everyone what I wrote.
Looking back now, I can say I was so dumb for getting married to young AND mom was totally right (but don't tell her I said that!). Sam and I started dating when I was 20 and not even 2 years later we were married. We rushed into it because he had just joined the navy and we both needed the extra cash and I needed to be able to contact him while he was out without problems. Through the deployments and realizations that we really didn't know each other as well as we thought we did, things changed very fast.
I remember a lot of fighting. It's very hard for me to remember any of the good times together, and there were a few but not many, because all we did was fight towards the end. I couldn't sleep and I was emotionally eating. And I put back all of the weight I had originally lost on WW plus 10-20 lbs. I would say I gained about 50lbs. Then we decided to separate and I moved back home to Pennsylvania while he stayed in Virginia. I was still a ball of nerves and not sleeping and our relationship never got any better, but I don't think we even tried to make it work. I filed for divorce in February the year after we separated. He was already engaged to be married after he finished a deployment again. Our divorce was finalized in July of that year. I was 25 years old and already divorced. How did this happen?
I'm not really sure there was any compassion that helped me though any of this. I did forgive him and also forgave myself. Everyone makes mistakes and this just so happened to be a large mistake for both of us but we can't dwell on that forever. I didn't want to be in an unhappy relationship for the rest of my life. I'm sure he didn't either.
I coped with this by talking about it with my friends and family. Sam and I have no contact, we don't talk about anything and we have no mutual friends so it makes it a lot easier to forgive and forget and it's better this way. Last week while on vacation with a friend, she turned around and said to me "this isn't how I expected my life to turn out at all." I said "yea, I didn't expect to be a 25 year old divorcee either and this isn't how I expected my life either. But after everything that has happened, I can't imagine it being any better than this right now." Both of us have an education, a great family for support, awesome friends, good jobs, she has a healthy child and we both have very amazing supportive men in our lives.
I think the life I have now is how I actually ended up being able to cope so well with everything I've been through and I wouldn't trade it for anything.
-Ginny
Monday, June 6, 2011
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn
So, it has once again been ages since I've updated but I don't really give a shit. It does make me feel better to be able to put what I've been filling into writing. So much has happened! I feel like something new and exciting happens in my life like at least once every 2 weeks! I also remembered the other day that when I first started this blog I was supposed to write a blog about people and things that I have rid my life of and for good reasons and never wrote that soooooo, here it is!
I finally finished my spring semester of actual sit-down-in-a-class-&-interact for the first time in well over 7 years. I finished my associates online and in order to get into another college I first had to take a math class. Intermediate Algebra, at 8am. 2 days a week. What the hell was I thinking. I am not a morning person at all. It was awful, I literally had to con myself into getting out of bed in the morning with thoughts of going back to bed after my hour & a half long class was done. I think that was the only thing that got me through. Anyway, 5 months later and I finally finished!! And I barley hung on, but I finished and conquered you, you stupid algebra! I never have to take another math class in school again! I finished with a 76%, so it wasn't awful, but could have been better. Whatever. The good news is that I am finally going to finish my BS! At Penn State!
It's going to sound really gay and ridiculous, but I am so proud of myself for getting into Penn State and getting to finish my BS at such a well known school. I honestly never thought I would have the chance to do something like this. I never labeled myself as a smart girl, and I never have been very good with school. I'm just super proud of myself and I think it's awesome that I have this opportunity to do this.
I also realized the other day how unbelievably lucky I am to have such a great and fantastic support system of friends and family. And I'm so glad that I've discarded the bad apples from my life. But more on that next. Seriously though, I was having a rough day the other day. It was Sunday night before my final portfolio in math was due and I was having the hardest time in the world trying to figure out a few of the math problems. I was over eating and just coming off the plateau that I finally hurdled over, I was stressed out that I was going to gain all the weight back that I lost (not possible to gain over 40lb back in one week, but whatever, I was stressed!). On top of that, I was worried about Kristin (sorry about droppin' names, haha), who was also plateaued but I didn't feel like she was trying and wasn't working out. I told her but immediately felt regret because I almost didn't feel like it was my place to say something like that to her. I was surprised by her reaction and it actually made me cry. She told me that I was good friend for looking out for her and trying to keep her motivated. It literally made me cry. Kyle thought I was insane. I am, but that's a whole other chapter! Anyway, the moral of this story is that I have such an amazing group of friends. Jenna, Kristin, Kyle, Steve and everyone at work. Even my brother has been surprisingly supportive. My mom will encourage me with whatever, so that kind of goes without saying. I'm just so lucky to have so many wonderful people in my life. I don't need anyone else at this point. <3
But, as I started my journey to becoming a better person with school and health, I also noticed that some of my 'friends' were not on the same page as me. We are 27 years old. There's absolutely not reason for someone our age to need to go out to the bar more 1 night every month, IF THAT! Yes, a girls night out or whatever is fine, but when you start making a habit of it and letting it affect everything from your marriage to your friends that you grew up with by trading them in for a more alcoholic crowd then you have a problem. It just wasn't the path I wanted to go down so I literally stopped calling or answering the phones with she called. It finally stopped and we have not spoken in over 6 months. It's been amazing. She and I did weight watchers together about 4 years ago. She lost over 70lbs and was looking great and doing such a good job. Then all the above things started happening. And she gained back every single pound she lost plus some. It's a sad situation but you can only try to help someone for so long before you literally say fuck it. The same goes for a few other friends. Pushing all your friends aside for people you don't even know. Getting pissy when I have to change plans because I have a job and go to school and you live off your husbands pay and don't have to do anything except drink.
So, I finally said I'm done. I washed my hands of it. I once used the description at work about how I felt and it was pretty good. I said it's like we were both in a lake swimming and a whirlpool came out of nowhere. I stuck around for a little because she was in there with me but decided that I wanted to be able to get us both out, so I swam as hard as I could, trying to encourage her and made it back to shore and when I looked back she was still stuck in that whirlpool making no efforts to get out. And there was no way I was going back in after her into it. You can only help people for so long. They need to want to help themselves.
So, that's my story. I also feel like it's about time I make a new goal for myself weight loss wise. I'm going to think about what I want to do about that, then next time I'll post it on here! Have a great day guys!
I finally finished my spring semester of actual sit-down-in-a-class-&-interact for the first time in well over 7 years. I finished my associates online and in order to get into another college I first had to take a math class. Intermediate Algebra, at 8am. 2 days a week. What the hell was I thinking. I am not a morning person at all. It was awful, I literally had to con myself into getting out of bed in the morning with thoughts of going back to bed after my hour & a half long class was done. I think that was the only thing that got me through. Anyway, 5 months later and I finally finished!! And I barley hung on, but I finished and conquered you, you stupid algebra! I never have to take another math class in school again! I finished with a 76%, so it wasn't awful, but could have been better. Whatever. The good news is that I am finally going to finish my BS! At Penn State!
It's going to sound really gay and ridiculous, but I am so proud of myself for getting into Penn State and getting to finish my BS at such a well known school. I honestly never thought I would have the chance to do something like this. I never labeled myself as a smart girl, and I never have been very good with school. I'm just super proud of myself and I think it's awesome that I have this opportunity to do this.
I also realized the other day how unbelievably lucky I am to have such a great and fantastic support system of friends and family. And I'm so glad that I've discarded the bad apples from my life. But more on that next. Seriously though, I was having a rough day the other day. It was Sunday night before my final portfolio in math was due and I was having the hardest time in the world trying to figure out a few of the math problems. I was over eating and just coming off the plateau that I finally hurdled over, I was stressed out that I was going to gain all the weight back that I lost (not possible to gain over 40lb back in one week, but whatever, I was stressed!). On top of that, I was worried about Kristin (sorry about droppin' names, haha), who was also plateaued but I didn't feel like she was trying and wasn't working out. I told her but immediately felt regret because I almost didn't feel like it was my place to say something like that to her. I was surprised by her reaction and it actually made me cry. She told me that I was good friend for looking out for her and trying to keep her motivated. It literally made me cry. Kyle thought I was insane. I am, but that's a whole other chapter! Anyway, the moral of this story is that I have such an amazing group of friends. Jenna, Kristin, Kyle, Steve and everyone at work. Even my brother has been surprisingly supportive. My mom will encourage me with whatever, so that kind of goes without saying. I'm just so lucky to have so many wonderful people in my life. I don't need anyone else at this point. <3
But, as I started my journey to becoming a better person with school and health, I also noticed that some of my 'friends' were not on the same page as me. We are 27 years old. There's absolutely not reason for someone our age to need to go out to the bar more 1 night every month, IF THAT! Yes, a girls night out or whatever is fine, but when you start making a habit of it and letting it affect everything from your marriage to your friends that you grew up with by trading them in for a more alcoholic crowd then you have a problem. It just wasn't the path I wanted to go down so I literally stopped calling or answering the phones with she called. It finally stopped and we have not spoken in over 6 months. It's been amazing. She and I did weight watchers together about 4 years ago. She lost over 70lbs and was looking great and doing such a good job. Then all the above things started happening. And she gained back every single pound she lost plus some. It's a sad situation but you can only try to help someone for so long before you literally say fuck it. The same goes for a few other friends. Pushing all your friends aside for people you don't even know. Getting pissy when I have to change plans because I have a job and go to school and you live off your husbands pay and don't have to do anything except drink.
So, I finally said I'm done. I washed my hands of it. I once used the description at work about how I felt and it was pretty good. I said it's like we were both in a lake swimming and a whirlpool came out of nowhere. I stuck around for a little because she was in there with me but decided that I wanted to be able to get us both out, so I swam as hard as I could, trying to encourage her and made it back to shore and when I looked back she was still stuck in that whirlpool making no efforts to get out. And there was no way I was going back in after her into it. You can only help people for so long. They need to want to help themselves.
So, that's my story. I also feel like it's about time I make a new goal for myself weight loss wise. I'm going to think about what I want to do about that, then next time I'll post it on here! Have a great day guys!
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Hit a brick wall...hard.
I suppose I'm not being very efficient with keeping up with blogging about everything. And it's not like I have a whole slew of people that read this anyway, so I think that's why I don't bother. With the whole weight loss thing, I've been keeping up and putting in some good work. I've just recently started moving a lot more. It's been pretty hard to work around so much stuff that's going on, with work and school and having a life. But I've been trying to faithfully go to Zumba on Sundays every week and when I do, it's quite the workout. Kyle and I walked 2.7 miles yesterday. We were gone for a little under a hour and it was awesome. I didn't feel tired or about to die and it was wonderful to be able to walk and get so much activity in this week. So far I'm up to 24 activity points whereas I'm usually a steady 11. I plan on taking the dog for another walk tomorrow in the early morning for maybe a half hour.
So anyway, I do feel like I've been floating around this 207-209 weight range for the last 3 weeks. And I know that it was my fault for the most part the first couple weeks because all I've done lately is eat. And eat. And eat haha. It's been a pretty fun couple weeks, but now it's back to the grind. I have to be serious. I've come so far and now I have a WEDDING to look amazing for. And I just want to be healthy and happy for the first time in as far back as I can remember. I never took my measurements and now I'm kicking myself in the ass, because I know for a fact that I've lost some sweet inches. I'm down from a size 18 jean to a VERY loose size 16. And my shirts are all fitting a lot better too.
I forgot that I started this blog like 3 weeks ago! Oops! Well, since then I still feel like I've plateaued and you know what, I'm kind of ok with it this time. Last time I did WW and hit this wall, I backed off and started eating crap again. This time I've decided to say F you to this wall and I'm going to break through it and get to the other side. I'm starting Jillians 30 Day Shred. From what I understand, it's an ass kicker but that's an awesome thing. It will also help me get out of this plateau rut by switching up my style. I'm currently weighing in at 204.6, which means that I've lost 21.6lbs so far! So exciting! Since Jan 2010 I've lost 37lbs, which is awesome. I feel better about myself and I can officially tell my fat clothes to get the hell out of here!
I have a few things keeping me motivated right now and keeping my head on in the game. The first one is my sister is in Afghanistan and I told her that by the time she came back I would have lost 30 lbs. Since she's been gone, I've only lost about 5 lbs so I still have 25 more to go! I hope I can get there, if not super close! If I do get there, I will be almost to my goal weight which is 155.
The other motivation (besides my awesome friends, amazing fiance and supportive family) is that Kyle and I have decided that we are going to have a destination wedding! We are having it in St. Lucia and are renting a villa for the week. As of right now, this is our plan. Hopefully we get the amount of money we need for it and can make this a reality. We have done a lot of number crunching and also decided that we are going to have to take out a loan but it's still going to be cheaper for us to do it this way then have it anywhere here.
So that's the plan for now. I will keep everyone updated on how much this 30 day shred kicks my ass!! I'll keep updates more often hopefully (school is almost done!)! Have a great day everyone!
So anyway, I do feel like I've been floating around this 207-209 weight range for the last 3 weeks. And I know that it was my fault for the most part the first couple weeks because all I've done lately is eat. And eat. And eat haha. It's been a pretty fun couple weeks, but now it's back to the grind. I have to be serious. I've come so far and now I have a WEDDING to look amazing for. And I just want to be healthy and happy for the first time in as far back as I can remember. I never took my measurements and now I'm kicking myself in the ass, because I know for a fact that I've lost some sweet inches. I'm down from a size 18 jean to a VERY loose size 16. And my shirts are all fitting a lot better too.
I forgot that I started this blog like 3 weeks ago! Oops! Well, since then I still feel like I've plateaued and you know what, I'm kind of ok with it this time. Last time I did WW and hit this wall, I backed off and started eating crap again. This time I've decided to say F you to this wall and I'm going to break through it and get to the other side. I'm starting Jillians 30 Day Shred. From what I understand, it's an ass kicker but that's an awesome thing. It will also help me get out of this plateau rut by switching up my style. I'm currently weighing in at 204.6, which means that I've lost 21.6lbs so far! So exciting! Since Jan 2010 I've lost 37lbs, which is awesome. I feel better about myself and I can officially tell my fat clothes to get the hell out of here!
I have a few things keeping me motivated right now and keeping my head on in the game. The first one is my sister is in Afghanistan and I told her that by the time she came back I would have lost 30 lbs. Since she's been gone, I've only lost about 5 lbs so I still have 25 more to go! I hope I can get there, if not super close! If I do get there, I will be almost to my goal weight which is 155.
The other motivation (besides my awesome friends, amazing fiance and supportive family) is that Kyle and I have decided that we are going to have a destination wedding! We are having it in St. Lucia and are renting a villa for the week. As of right now, this is our plan. Hopefully we get the amount of money we need for it and can make this a reality. We have done a lot of number crunching and also decided that we are going to have to take out a loan but it's still going to be cheaper for us to do it this way then have it anywhere here.
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| Who wouldn't want to get married here!? |
So that's the plan for now. I will keep everyone updated on how much this 30 day shred kicks my ass!! I'll keep updates more often hopefully (school is almost done!)! Have a great day everyone!
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
So much has happened!!
It's been so long since I've touched this and so much has happened! It was crazy!! Well, everyone knows we went on our trip to NYC to see the Islanders and the Pens play. The Islanders have long been Kyles favorite team and he's been dying to get to the Nassau Coliseum before they decided to tear it up since it's so old. So, he got tickets to see the game for Xmas. Right on the glass. Behind the Islanders bench! He was so excited and we had such a great time. If anyone follows hockey they also know that this is the infamous game that they had over 300+ penalty minutes and there were, no joke, 3-4 players left on each bench.
It was a great time! The whole weekend we pretty much spent running around but that's ok because it was the first time in NY for both of us and we wanted to see the 'Big Apple' too. The day after the game we got up (at the buttcrack of dawn because we couldn't sleep in the entire time we were there) and left for the city. We took our first NYC rail mass transportation into the city via the Long Island Rail Road and it was pretty scary because the train bounces around and people walk from car to car while the train is moving like it's no big deal.
We got to Penn Station and starting walking and had NO IDEA WHERE WE WERE. Kyle refused to let us get a map because then we would 'definitely look tourist-y'. He's insane haha. We had an idea of what we wanted to see and eventually figured out for the most part the road system. We went up the Empire State building and it was SO COLD!! The wind was blowing you away practically. It was really beautiful though, to be able to see for miles. That was the closet we got to the Statue of Liberty though haha. We went into Macys which was super cool because every Christmas I get the 'Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus' and to see the building and how really old it is just blew me away. They even had wooden escalators.
We walked pretty much right into Times Square and you know what? I wasn't as impressed with it as I thought I was going to be. TV makes it look so much bigger and cooler than I personally think it was. It was awesome to see in person and be like oh man, I was there but it didn't really suit my fancy haha. We did eat some New York Pizza though and it was fantastic.
We walked as far as Rockefeller Plaza then walked the whole way back to Penn Station. 50+ blocks in one day. I was feeling it for the entire next week ahaha. We had a great time but we were a little bummed that we didn't get to see the WTC site or Little Italy or Brooklyn and I secretly wanted to see Soho haha. We did all of this in about 4 and a half hours because we were back in the hotel by about 6pm.
By this time, Kyle was acting a little weird and I was getting slightly frustrated with him because he wanted to go ice skating and I was so sore that I didn't want to go, but put on my big girl panties and got ready to go. We got the whole way there and they were 'closed for the season'......uh, really? It's the beginning of February in NY and you're closed for the season?? So, we were both kind of pissed about that and decided that we were just gonna go back to the hotel and buy a movie and relax for the rest of the night.
When we got back to the hotel, Kyle told me he was going to go downstairs to ask if we bought a movie could he put it on his credit card instead of mine and was gone for a while so I was sitting there googling how far we walked and how cool it was and what we need to see next time, etc! When he came back into the room he wasn't saying much and walked over to me still being kind of weird. I noticed he had something in his pocket and I was like what are you doing??! He told me that I made 2 of his dreams come true this weekend by taking him to see the Islanders play at home and also by going to NYC. Then he got down on one knee and asked if I would make another one of his dreams come true....He asked me to marry him!! OMG. I was speechless. I think I actually said Are you serious??!?! Of course I said yes, but I was so in shock. We had talked about it and what it would be like and all that fun stuff but I had no idea he was doing it so soon. The ring is gorgeous! He did an awesome job!
So after that fun filled weekend, I come home to a 4lb weight gain on the scale. Poopoo. Whatever, I knew I would make it better this week coming up and that it was just the Valentines day dinner Kyle brought home at 10pm for us the night before(that'll do it!). I got on the scale yesterday to an amazing 211.2lbs. 6.9lb weight loss for the week and a total of 15 in the 6 weeks I've been doing it. I feel great! It's awesome. I've gone down 2 pant sizes since this time last year and I was a DD last year and went bra shopping on Sunday and I'm down to a C. It's really cool to actually see it happening!
Ok, well I think this was really long and ridiculous, so I'll leave you with that. I'll update more often! -G
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| Before the game! |
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| This is how close we were. Kyle loved Gilles fumanchu. |
It was a great time! The whole weekend we pretty much spent running around but that's ok because it was the first time in NY for both of us and we wanted to see the 'Big Apple' too. The day after the game we got up (at the buttcrack of dawn because we couldn't sleep in the entire time we were there) and left for the city. We took our first NYC rail mass transportation into the city via the Long Island Rail Road and it was pretty scary because the train bounces around and people walk from car to car while the train is moving like it's no big deal.
We got to Penn Station and starting walking and had NO IDEA WHERE WE WERE. Kyle refused to let us get a map because then we would 'definitely look tourist-y'. He's insane haha. We had an idea of what we wanted to see and eventually figured out for the most part the road system. We went up the Empire State building and it was SO COLD!! The wind was blowing you away practically. It was really beautiful though, to be able to see for miles. That was the closet we got to the Statue of Liberty though haha. We went into Macys which was super cool because every Christmas I get the 'Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus' and to see the building and how really old it is just blew me away. They even had wooden escalators.
We walked pretty much right into Times Square and you know what? I wasn't as impressed with it as I thought I was going to be. TV makes it look so much bigger and cooler than I personally think it was. It was awesome to see in person and be like oh man, I was there but it didn't really suit my fancy haha. We did eat some New York Pizza though and it was fantastic.
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| Loved him some NYC pizza haha |
By this time, Kyle was acting a little weird and I was getting slightly frustrated with him because he wanted to go ice skating and I was so sore that I didn't want to go, but put on my big girl panties and got ready to go. We got the whole way there and they were 'closed for the season'......uh, really? It's the beginning of February in NY and you're closed for the season?? So, we were both kind of pissed about that and decided that we were just gonna go back to the hotel and buy a movie and relax for the rest of the night.
When we got back to the hotel, Kyle told me he was going to go downstairs to ask if we bought a movie could he put it on his credit card instead of mine and was gone for a while so I was sitting there googling how far we walked and how cool it was and what we need to see next time, etc! When he came back into the room he wasn't saying much and walked over to me still being kind of weird. I noticed he had something in his pocket and I was like what are you doing??! He told me that I made 2 of his dreams come true this weekend by taking him to see the Islanders play at home and also by going to NYC. Then he got down on one knee and asked if I would make another one of his dreams come true....He asked me to marry him!! OMG. I was speechless. I think I actually said Are you serious??!?! Of course I said yes, but I was so in shock. We had talked about it and what it would be like and all that fun stuff but I had no idea he was doing it so soon. The ring is gorgeous! He did an awesome job!
So after that fun filled weekend, I come home to a 4lb weight gain on the scale. Poopoo. Whatever, I knew I would make it better this week coming up and that it was just the Valentines day dinner Kyle brought home at 10pm for us the night before(that'll do it!). I got on the scale yesterday to an amazing 211.2lbs. 6.9lb weight loss for the week and a total of 15 in the 6 weeks I've been doing it. I feel great! It's awesome. I've gone down 2 pant sizes since this time last year and I was a DD last year and went bra shopping on Sunday and I'm down to a C. It's really cool to actually see it happening!
Ok, well I think this was really long and ridiculous, so I'll leave you with that. I'll update more often! -G
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Mini-Vacay
I feel like a new person and I've only lost 10 lbs (well, 9.9, but who's counting!). I lost 3.7 lbs this last week. I feel like I have a lot more energy and I think I can see a little difference in my overall appearance. I need to get on getting my measurements so I know when I'm losing and can feel more motivated about it! I also still haven't taken our 'before' pictures. Kyle bought our measuring tape last night so hopefully I can get those stats up here soon.
I was browsing facebook today and I came across this guy who, in my opinion, looks like the biggest tool ever:
Make up and hair straighteners are for the ladies. Please back off!
I went to lunch with a good friend today and it was nice to be able to catch up with her about what's been going on in her life. I know that I'm super worn out and I'm counting down the days until school is over for the semester. If I can survive through this math class, then I'll be able to make it the rest of the way. I need to re-evaluate my schedule and make some time changes to fit things in and be more productive. I haven't seen Jenna in I think 2 weeks. I hope to see her for the Super Bowl this Sunday.
Kyle and I are going to New York next Thursday. We haven't even booked the room yet! See, I'm the worlds biggest procrastinator. I'm trying to get finances in order and decide how we are getting around up there. We are going primarily to see the Islanders play the Pens. Kyle has always wanted to go to the Nassau Coliseum to see the Islanders play and for Christmas, he got 2 tickets. On the glass, center ice, behind the visitors bench. Yea, I know. I'm the best girlfriend ever. We are also planning on spending most of Saturday in New York City. We are trying to get a good game plan and picking where we are going to eat and not spend the most money. And least amount of damage it will do to my points allowance hehe.
I'm going to spend today trying to get caught up on homework and this endless pile of laundry that accumulates in my room weekly. I want to be caught up on everything before we leave on Thursday so I don't have anything to worry about pissing around with it after the vacation! Keep your fingers crossed I'll be able to get those pictures(yuck) and measurements(double yuck) up before then! -G
I was browsing facebook today and I came across this guy who, in my opinion, looks like the biggest tool ever:
Make up and hair straighteners are for the ladies. Please back off!
I went to lunch with a good friend today and it was nice to be able to catch up with her about what's been going on in her life. I know that I'm super worn out and I'm counting down the days until school is over for the semester. If I can survive through this math class, then I'll be able to make it the rest of the way. I need to re-evaluate my schedule and make some time changes to fit things in and be more productive. I haven't seen Jenna in I think 2 weeks. I hope to see her for the Super Bowl this Sunday.
Kyle and I are going to New York next Thursday. We haven't even booked the room yet! See, I'm the worlds biggest procrastinator. I'm trying to get finances in order and decide how we are getting around up there. We are going primarily to see the Islanders play the Pens. Kyle has always wanted to go to the Nassau Coliseum to see the Islanders play and for Christmas, he got 2 tickets. On the glass, center ice, behind the visitors bench. Yea, I know. I'm the best girlfriend ever. We are also planning on spending most of Saturday in New York City. We are trying to get a good game plan and picking where we are going to eat and not spend the most money. And least amount of damage it will do to my points allowance hehe.
I'm going to spend today trying to get caught up on homework and this endless pile of laundry that accumulates in my room weekly. I want to be caught up on everything before we leave on Thursday so I don't have anything to worry about pissing around with it after the vacation! Keep your fingers crossed I'll be able to get those pictures(yuck) and measurements(double yuck) up before then! -G
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Mind over batter (hehe, thanks Jenna)....
I thought I did ok yesterday given my circumstances! I worked with a floater yesterday who was hungry and ordered pizza! Eeks! I only ate 2 small slices but OMG they were so freaking gooodddddddd. haha, I controlled myself so that's all that matters. Then we did outback for dinner with the family. I didn't eat any of that amazing looking blooming onion they brought to the table, just continued drinking my diet coke. I only had 1 small slice of the delicious bread they bring too, no butter. I order chicken on the barbie(light style), but instead of the veggies I ordered the garlic mashed potatoes. The waiter looks at me and says, you realize those don't make it very 'light style'. Ugh, whatever. I took my time eating the chicken, which was really really tender and good, and talked and laughed in between eating. I only ate half of the chicken and half of the potatoes. Suck on that waiter guy. :)
We had date night last night and we went to the movies. Oh lord I eyeballed that popcorn and those sour patch kids.....Kyle only got a very soft gooey chocolate chip cookie too. I didn't touch anything except a coke zero! Then...I gave in. To 2 steak and shake chocolate chip cookies(which have 11 total points). They way I see it, after all those trials and tempations everywhere today, my 2 11 point chocolate cookies were the best thing that ever happened to me.
I was reading the WW message boards today and came across this:
If you're "Interested" in losing weight...
... You stick with it only until something better comes along (such as doughnuts)
... How you feel determines your outcome. If you don't 'feel like it', you stop your efforts.
... You need to see results. When the scale doesn't move, you lose your motivation.
... You blame everything else (people, travel, circumstances) for your struggles with staying on program.
... Whenever you face challenges in life, you give up and plan you'll start your program again tomorrow.
~~HOWEVER:
If you're "Committed" to losing weight...
... Nothing stops your efforts. You stick with your program, "no matter what."
... Emotions don't control your actions. You stay on track even when you don't feel like it.
... Your motivation isn't linked to the scale. You assume that if you stay motivated and work hard, you'll eventually see results.
... You don't depend on other people for your success. You know it's up to you, not them.
... A bad day or a lot of challenges don't affect your efforts. You keep going in spite of it.
** So which one are you? "Interested or Committed"??
-- author unknown
I think I may be a mixture of both haha. Although I really do believe in the program and know it's the best thing that has happened to me ever! I'm losing weight AND I got my first 'are you losing weight' question today!! That's when you know you have to keep on pushing and doing what you're doing. I'm going to go jump in the shower and take a quick store run real quick! :)
We had date night last night and we went to the movies. Oh lord I eyeballed that popcorn and those sour patch kids.....Kyle only got a very soft gooey chocolate chip cookie too. I didn't touch anything except a coke zero! Then...I gave in. To 2 steak and shake chocolate chip cookies(which have 11 total points). They way I see it, after all those trials and tempations everywhere today, my 2 11 point chocolate cookies were the best thing that ever happened to me.
I was reading the WW message boards today and came across this:
If you're "Interested" in losing weight...
... You stick with it only until something better comes along (such as doughnuts)
... How you feel determines your outcome. If you don't 'feel like it', you stop your efforts.
... You need to see results. When the scale doesn't move, you lose your motivation.
... You blame everything else (people, travel, circumstances) for your struggles with staying on program.
... Whenever you face challenges in life, you give up and plan you'll start your program again tomorrow.
~~HOWEVER:
If you're "Committed" to losing weight...
... Nothing stops your efforts. You stick with your program, "no matter what."
... Emotions don't control your actions. You stay on track even when you don't feel like it.
... Your motivation isn't linked to the scale. You assume that if you stay motivated and work hard, you'll eventually see results.
... You don't depend on other people for your success. You know it's up to you, not them.
... A bad day or a lot of challenges don't affect your efforts. You keep going in spite of it.
** So which one are you? "Interested or Committed"??
-- author unknown
I think I may be a mixture of both haha. Although I really do believe in the program and know it's the best thing that has happened to me ever! I'm losing weight AND I got my first 'are you losing weight' question today!! That's when you know you have to keep on pushing and doing what you're doing. I'm going to go jump in the shower and take a quick store run real quick! :)
Thursday, January 27, 2011
I've offically lost my first 5 pounds back on weight watchers! It's awesome that I'm back to losing the weight and not having to struggle with it. I've never had a problem not losing on weight watchers, so I'm not sure what made me think I could do it any other way! I'm going to take a brief nap then come back and try to figure this 'blog' thing out :)
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