Mind over batter (hehe, thanks Jenna)....

I thought I did ok yesterday given my circumstances!  I worked with a floater yesterday who was hungry and ordered pizza!  Eeks!  I only ate 2 small slices but OMG they were so freaking gooodddddddd.  haha, I controlled myself so that's all that matters.  Then we did outback for dinner with the family.  I didn't eat any of that amazing looking blooming onion they brought to the table, just continued drinking my diet coke.  I only had 1 small slice of the delicious bread they bring too, no butter.  I order chicken on the barbie(light style), but instead of the veggies I ordered the garlic mashed potatoes.  The waiter looks at me and says, you realize those don't make it very 'light style'.  Ugh, whatever.  I took my time eating the chicken, which was really really tender and good, and talked and laughed in between eating.  I only ate half of the chicken and half of the potatoes.  Suck on that waiter guy.  :)

We had date night last night and we went to the movies.  Oh lord I eyeballed that popcorn and those sour patch kids.....Kyle only got a very soft gooey chocolate chip cookie too.  I didn't touch anything except a coke zero!  Then...I gave in.  To 2 steak and shake chocolate chip cookies(which have 11 total points).  They way I see it, after all those trials and tempations everywhere today, my 2 11 point chocolate cookies were the best thing that ever happened to me.  

I was reading the WW message boards today and came across this:

If you're "Interested" in losing weight...
... You stick with it only until something better comes along (such as doughnuts)
... How you feel determines your outcome. If you don't 'feel like it', you stop your efforts.
... You need to see results. When the scale doesn't move, you lose your motivation.
... You blame everything else (people, travel, circumstances) for your struggles with staying on program.
... Whenever you face challenges in life, you give up and plan you'll start your program again tomorrow.

~~HOWEVER:

If you're "Committed" to losing weight...
... Nothing stops your efforts. You stick with your program, "no matter what."
... Emotions don't control your actions. You stay on track even when you don't feel like it.
... Your motivation isn't linked to the scale. You assume that if you stay motivated and work hard, you'll eventually see results.
... You don't depend on other people for your success. You know it's up to you, not them.
... A bad day or a lot of challenges don't affect your efforts. You keep going in spite of it.

** So which one are you? "Interested or Committed"??

-- author unknown

I think I may be a mixture of both haha.  Although I really do believe in the program and know it's the best thing that has happened to me ever!  I'm losing weight AND I got my first 'are you losing weight' question today!!  That's when you know you have to keep on pushing and doing what you're doing.  I'm going to go jump in the shower and take a quick store run real quick!  :)

I've offically lost my first 5 pounds back on weight watchers!  It's awesome that I'm back to losing the weight and not having to struggle with it.  I've never had a problem not losing on weight watchers, so I'm not sure what made me think I could do it any other way!  I'm going to take a brief nap then come back and try to figure this 'blog' thing out :)

Slackkkerrrrr

Yes, that's totally me.  I have a math test at 8 am tomorrow (I would seriously like to punt the person who thought 8am was a great time for math) and then work at 4.  In between that time, I should be able to give a long big blog but until then, I will just update with my weight loss this week.  I lost 1.3 this week for a total of 6.2 in 2 weeks.  I almost said ONLY lost 1.3 but then realized that if I lose only 1 lb a week for a year, I will be at my goal weight.  So ummm, I'll take it! Any loss is a good one I guess at this point.  

I'm going to go finish teaching myself how to do this damn math then hit the sack!  Tomorrow!  I promise! -G

*Ahem* My name is Ginny....

And I'm an addict.  At least I feel that way.  Today is day 9 on Weight Watchers and I've spend the last 9 days doing really well and eating all the right things.  Then, after school today, I made my way to the bank.  I pass Burger King on the way there.  My mind started saying ohhhh, go get some breakfast from them!  F those pre-calculated points you already had planned out for breakfast!  Then I'm telling myself, no chubbasaurous!  You don't need it!  Wellllllllllllllll, I did it anyway!  It didn't throw me off, I still have quite a few points left for the day and I got a lot less and substantially smaller than I usually do.  So, I was proud of myself in that aspect.  Although I know I shouldn't have done it, I went ahead anyway.  I'm hoping to NOT make this a trend.  

I may have come up with a small simple solution to this problem though.  Kyle and I are trying to store some extra money away and buy healthier food, so my plan is to take whatever amount of money we spend on fast food and put that exact amount in our change jar.  So it'll be like we are spending double!!  Who wants to do that!!!  Sooo, I owe my bank $5 today.  Boo.  Next time, burger king demon, I will not give in!!

Anyway, I promised you all (I mean like the 2 of you that read this) that I would post our goals and dreams and aspirations(gag!hehe) on this blog post.  I also promised the negative energy post next time, so that may be done on Saturday!  Kyle and I are taking pictures tonight!  You know, the before this is how big I was and WOW LOOK AT ME NOW! ones?  I desperately want to be one of those people in those before and after pictures, the kind everyone does a double take at and puts their cheeseburgers down haha! If I can figure it out, I will post them on here.  Ugh!


I'll start with Kyle since he's not here and I have to think harder about it, so I will get him out of the way.  When we started dating, Kyle was 60 lbs lighter.  He likes to blame this on me and I like to blame it on 'love chub'.  Either way, he's miserable and not healthy and hates his new gut.  Since he started eating what I'm eating (he's not following weight watchers, just eating the same stuff as me), he's already lost 7 lbs.  That bastard!  So here are his stats:


Kyle:
Starting weight(1/11/11):  258.60
Latest weigh in(1/18/11):  251.4 

Personal Goals:
OBX Vacation(5/28/11):  215
Long term Goal:  180

Ginny:

Starting weight(1/11/11):  226.2
Latest weigh in(1/18/11):  221.3

Personal Goals:
St. Pattys Beauties(3/17/11):  12 lbs(209)
25 lbs to Summer(6/21/11):  25lbs(196)<= I would personally like to meet this one by 5/28/11 
Long term:  150



So kids, there you have our personal goals.  Maybe I'll throw those pictures on later tonight.  I also hope to be able to learn how to make this a cute little blog with new recipes and tricks that I learn along the way!  Anything to help someone else that's in my shoes!!  Have a great day and stay warm!   

Slightly unapologetic......

So, I have been struggling with my weight as far back as I can remember.  Honestly.  I'm pretty sure the first time I realized I was 'fat' was in middle school.....

I started this blog as a documentary of my weight loss and also that of my boyfriend.  I soon realized that it's also a pretty good place to vent about certain things and get a lot of stuff off my mind that has been going nonstop.   

My journey with Weight Watchers started back in 2007 I'm pretty sure.  At the time, I was freshly married to my now ex husband who was getting ready to deploy for 6 months.  I figured that him being on deployment would be an awesome time to lose some weight and really impress him when he got home.  I started out doing it for him, but as I started losing more weight I realized who it was really about: me.  By the time he got home from deployment, I had lost 35 lbs.  You know what he said to me when he saw me?  Nothing.  Not a 'wow, you look great' or 'look how good you look', NOTHING!  We got back to the hotel and I had brought my own food that was prepackaged and there were pringles there.  I'm never going to forget this, but he actually said to me; 'I thought you were on a diet, how and why are you eating those pringles?'.  Ummmm, yea.

So needless to say, our marriage began it's downward spiral within the next year or so and my weight did the opposite of that downward spiral and went back upwards.  Ugh, back to the drawing board.  Now, I'm not here to say that I was a perfect angel and that he was the sole reason behind our failed marriage because that's not true at all.  I think that at 23 and 24, you don't know what you want and we were not ready to be married by any means.

By the time our relationship was way sour and we were going through our divorce, I had officially gained back all of those amazing 35 pounds that I lost.  I was sad and depressed and trying to keep up with school that I had started because finally decided at 24, that I wanted to go back to school and do something with my life instead of bumming around from job to job.  School and divorce and weight loss = a tragic situation.  I didn't lose anymore weight.  I actually put on about 5 to 10 more than I originally started with.  FAIL.

Things finally started falling back into place.  Just within this last year mind you.  I have a great boyfriend, who has been my rock and support and my everything throughout the last year.  I have a great family and a new nephew who is probably the cutest thing in the entire world (I'm obviously a little biased in this opinion).  I have an amazing network of friends and without them I don't know what I would do.  Having a friend since 4th grade that you're still friends with is an accomplishment, even if we have had our fair share of battles and not talking.  I'm glad she's back in my life now and never want her to go away 8<.  I have also made a very successful friendship in someone I work with and she's right there beside me on the journey of weight-loss.  I also pushed out the bad and negative in my life (next blog).

With all that being said, I started weight watchers again last week.  I weighed in at, gulp(first time publicly admitting this), 226.2 lbs.  Which isn't bad coming down from I think it was 240ish when I started the first time(thank you braces for your initial 15 lbs weight loss when I first got you!)!  I don't feel like I weigh over 200lbs.  It's gross and I see these people on tv that look nothing like me but weigh the same as me!  Its frustrating and this is a trying time.  Anyway, I have my eye on the prize this time.  I weighed in today at 221.3 lbs.  I lost 4.9 lbs in my first week.  I'm proud of myself and also very encouraged as well.  I will have my list of goals posted next week plus the 'other blog about negative' up in a few days.  School and work are kicking my behind now, but I see PSU and graduation up ahead in the distance, so future here I come!